By DJ Sam

Chapter 8

Me: Then why can’t I get pregnant?

He had told me nothing was wrong with me. My ovaries were in perfect order. He asked me to bring my husband. But how would I drag him to the hospital for a check up. A plan formed in my mind. That night I was up to no good as I explored and experimented with him. My need for a baby was too great to see how this would destroy us. After Drew dozed off I took out the condom I had worn so I could collect his manliness for a check up. As I got back to bed he reached out to me and spooned me as he loved to do. That small action burned my conscience. I couldn’t sleep thinking of how deceptive I had become. Was a baby really worth lying to my husband? My heart screamed yes. He would be happy when he knows you are pregnant, it said.

Finally towards dawn I fell asleep. As usual we went as per our routine and the moment he had left I rushed to the doctor. He promised results in the next 24 hours. Those were the most agonizing hours I spent waiting for feedback. When I went in the doctor was shocked to find me alone as he had instructed me to bring my husband.

Me: he went off to an emergency meeting. He however told me to come so you could tell me the results.

Doctor: very well. Its unfortunate that your husband has a low sperm count. Its almost close to zero and for a healthy young man its really worrying. I would like for him to come for further evaluations.

I heard nothing else besides the low sperm count. Did he know all this time? Was that the reason why he didn’t want babies? Would I be able to live without a child of the man I loved?

Me: are there no medicines or foods he can take to boost their number I prayed and hoped they would be. When he went into explanatory mode I soaked it all in. I was the classic student, taking down notes as if my life depended in it. Of course it did. This was my life. Our life jus broken by the stolen manliness.